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In 2006 you said to me:

"I wish I would have met you 2 years ago."

Four years later, those words still resonate in the void of my sleepy mind. It's at times like these, as night becomes day, that I lose control and begin to ponder the what-ifs, maybes, and woulda-coulda-shouldas. Deep down I know that nothing would be different and that you will always be "that guy" but I can't help but wonder what life would be like at your side.

I don't regret any of the decisions I have made in this life, whether they have led me to you or taken me in the opposite direction. Although I continue to have the same feelings for you, you, my love, are teetering on the brink of insanity. A relationship that was once merely physical is slowly transforming into something else. Given both of our current situations and history, it would be extremely pretentious of me to think that this change is in any way earnest, but, then again, it wouldn't make sense, after all this time, for you to have to try to gas me up (??).

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I care deeply for you. I would like for you to be a constant in this science experiment life of variables. Whatever that means o_O