re·jec·tion (r -j k sh n). n. 1. The act of rejecting or the state of being rejected. 2. Something rejected.




Rejection can be a total blow to your self-image and have you thinking all kinds of craziness! I, personally, am deathly afraid of being rejected. I guess it's because it's a feeling I haven't really experienced. I consider myself to be a very confident individual, but is it wrong of me to be hesitant to do some things because of this fear?

As a Gemini (Yes, I'm going there.), I posses a host of qualities that, to the observer, make me out to be a strong, willful, intelligent soul capable of overcoming any negative reactions to my ideas, behavior...whatever. What's not readily visible to said observer is the fact that I am a fucking nervous wreck!


We Gemini women analyze every situation 3 and 4 times and secretly worry that we aren't making people happy and that shit is the absolute worst! In turn, we end up not pursuing certain endeavors or attempting to build relationships (platonic and/or otherwise) with certain people.


This is not something you get over from one day to the next, rather an innate propensity to totally screw yourself over and be pissed about it for years to come.


I guess where I'm going with all of this is that I'm slowly realizing that it's okay to wear my heart on my sleeve and that whomever is truly deserving of this gargantuan, Gemini heart might be hiding in some realm outside of my comfort zone and it's up to me to get out there and find him. (Great.)

Tonight, during movie night at my house, my mind began to do that thing it does at the end of the day. My thoughts circled in my head faster and evermore erratically like a sandstorm of ideas ready envelope my whole brain in its fury. I thought about many things, some of which I've pored over before. But when the dust settled and the sun peeked through, it became clear to me that I need a change.

I have become the victim of my own complacency and my true personality is screaming for attention. With that said, I have decided to make a list of 10 promise I would like to keep to myself and others beginning today. These promises are drawn from different aspects of my life and are in no particular order. Here goes...

1. Find a job. Being at home all day after school is SO effing boring! 
2. Volunteer at the library. I love libraries and I know that they are facing budget cuts. I would like to do my part to help them by donating a few weekends to reading to kids or seniors.
3. Call my sister. My little sister is such an intelligent young lady. I would love to talk to her about her experiences and how she's doing in school.
4. Organize my closet. My closet is bigger than many NYCers' kitchens! It always takes me forever to find anything in there. >_<
5. Exercise. I'd love to tone up a little around my midsection. Nothing drastic. Maybe some running?
6. Learn a new language. I'm thinking Arabic. Yalla!
7. Be nice to people. I can be the biggest bitch sometimes. Life is too short to be such a meanie.
8. Take a trip. Martha's Vineyard, anyone?
9. Reconnecting with old friends. We always say how much we miss each other. I think it's time for a reunion!
10. Drink more wine! Good for you and it gets you drunk? Where do I sign up?

Okay, those are my promises. Try doing the same for you! Good luck!

It's funny how the last person you would expect to change your life is the first one to do it.

After a long chat with an old friend, I have decided to
listen to myself and go.

I can't say that I feel bad about my decision.
I am long overdue for some selfishness, albeit temporary.

Karma may be a bitch but I think I can take her.

It's so funny how the inhabitants of one little island can be worlds apart from each other. In the years that I've called this place home, I have been blessed to view the city from many different angles: From a fifth floor walk up on the Upper East Side to a coveted Washington Heights 3-bedroom. Whether I catch glimpses of the East River or the Hudson, dream to the lullaby of the FDR or the West Side Highway, one key thing remains the same. Manhattan can be so tribal and hung up on addresses that we fail to realize that we are all people. We love. We hate. We bleed. At the end of the day, there are more important things in this world than whether or not you have a doorman or you live in the projects. Wake up, New York. It's time.

Maybe I had too much time on my hands.
Maybe I'm just in too deep.
These songs get me every time.

"There's nothing like you and I baby...
This is no ordinary love."



"You are the flame in my heart..."

Really? That's how you feel?
We've been down almost 5 years and you try to play like you're to cool for school?
Go that way! ------------------->

I hope you enjoyed it because that was the LAST phone call you will ever receive from this or any of the 4 numbers attached to my name in your contacts.

And don't let your people start calling me again either because I WILL get stupid.
Feelings will get hurt. This is Ari. You forgot?

Apology accepted =|

Lots of changes going on in my life right now.
Let's just say that I'm shaking things up.
I'm a firm believer in the fact that everything happens for a reason (Be it know or unknown).

My cousin has a tattoo that says "Reason. Season. Lifetime."
It basically means that people come into your life for a reason whether the stay for a season or a lifetime. Tell me about it!

Honestly, I'm happy in my current situation. It's uncomplicated, fun, and pretty damn comfortable. The question is: will it last for a season or a lifetime?

I'm addicted to his smoky voice and his heavy eyes.
He's the only one that keeps me on my toes.

Am I wrong? Definitely.

We know it. We don't care. This is bigger than us.